CAMHS Referral: What Parents Can Do While They Wait

Waiting for a Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS) appointment can feel like being stuck in limbo, particularly when you can see your teenager struggling day to day. This article sets out who can make a referral, what a strong referral letter should contain, and what you can realistically do while you wait.

---

In short: This article explains the CAMHS referral process for UK parents, what a strong referral letter should contain, practical ways to support your teenager during the wait, and how to weigh up private therapy if the wait becomes difficult.

• GPs, schools and sometimes parents can refer to CAMHS, depending on your area
• A strong referral letter includes specific symptoms, duration, impact and risk details
• Routine, communication with school and documenting changes help during the wait

Who can refer and what the assessment covers

In most parts of the UK, a GP can refer your teenager to CAMHS. Many areas also accept referrals from schools, educational psychologists or other professionals already involved with your child, such as a school counsellor or paediatrician. Some services accept self-referrals or parent referrals directly, though this varies by local authority and NHS trust, so it's worth checking what your area allows.

Once a referral is accepted, the initial assessment usually looks at your teenager's current difficulties, how long they've been going on, and how they're affecting daily life: school, sleep, eating, friendships and family relationships. The clinician will also ask about any risk to safety, family history of mental health difficulties, and what support has already been tried.

The NHS has information on what to expect from CAMHS and how referrals generally work, though exact processes differ between trusts. It's sensible to ask your GP or the service directly what their local pathway looks like, including whether there's a single point of access or a specific referral form.

What a good referral letter contains

A referral letter that gives a clear picture of your teenager's situation tends to be assessed more efficiently than one that is vague. If a GP or school is writing the letter, you can help by providing specific details beforehand.

A strong referral usually includes:

• The specific difficulties your teenager is experiencing, described in concrete terms rather than general ones
• How long these difficulties have been present and whether they're getting worse
• The impact on school attendance, performance, friendships or family life
• Any changes in eating, sleeping or mood that you've noticed
• Any risk indicators, including self-harm, thoughts of suicide, or significant withdrawal
• What has already been tried, such as school counselling, pastoral support or a previous GP visit
• Relevant family history, if it's relevant to the current difficulties

It helps to write these points down yourself before the GP appointment, even if you don't share every detail with your teenager present. A letter that includes dates, specific examples and risk information is easier for a clinician to triage appropriately.

What helps while waiting

The waiting period is often the hardest part, not because nothing is happening, but because it can feel like nothing is happening. There are still things you can do.

Keeping daily routines steady, meals, sleep, some structure to the day, gives your teenager a sense of stability even when things feel uncertain. You don't need to overhaul family life, but small consistencies can help.

Staying in contact with school is worth the effort. Many schools have pastoral staff or a school counsellor who can offer some support in the interim, and they may also be able to make reasonable adjustments if attendance or concentration is affected.

Keep a simple record of how things are going: changes in mood, sleep, appetite or behaviour, and any incidents that worry you. This isn't about creating a formal document, just something that helps you notice patterns and gives you something concrete to share if you need to contact the GP again or update the CAMHS team.

If things escalate, particularly around safety, contact your GP again rather than waiting for the original appointment date. Referrals can sometimes be reprioritised if risk increases. Mind has guidance on supporting a young person in crisis, and Samaritans can be contacted if you or your teenager need someone to talk to urgently.

Talking to other parents who've been through CAMHS waits, whether through school networks or local support groups, can also make the experience feel less isolating, even if it doesn't speed anything up.

When to go private and what to ask about

There's no single point at which private therapy becomes the right choice. It depends on how your teenager is coping, how long the wait is likely to be, and what you can reasonably afford. If your teenager's difficulties are worsening, if school is becoming unmanageable, or if the wait feels genuinely harmful rather than just frustrating, it may be worth exploring private options alongside the NHS referral, not necessarily instead of it.

If you do look into private therapy, it helps to ask:

• Does the therapist have specific experience working with teenagers, rather than adults only?
• What approach do they use, and how do they tailor it to your teenager's age and situation?
• How soon could an initial session happen?
• What does ongoing cost look like, including any assessment fees?
• How will they involve you as a parent, if at all, given your teenager's age?

Platforms such as Mind a Porter list therapists who work specifically with teenagers, alongside independent practitioners you might find through other routes. If you're weighing this up, you can find a therapist for your teenager and compare experience, approach and availability before deciding.

Going private doesn't mean giving up on the NHS referral. Many families keep both options open, using private sessions to bridge the gap while staying on the CAMHS list.

What to do this week

If you're currently waiting, a few small steps this week can make the process feel less passive:

• Call your GP surgery to confirm the referral was sent and ask roughly where you are on the list
• Write down specific examples of what's changed for your teenager, in case you need to follow up
• Contact your teenager's school to ask what support they can offer in the meantime
• Decide whether private therapy is worth exploring now or worth keeping in mind for later
• Check in with your teenager directly, simply asking how they're finding things, without pressure to fix it immediately

None of these steps will shorten the wait on their own, but together they help you stay informed, keep your teenager supported, and make a considered decision if the wait becomes too long to manage alone.

Frequently asked questions

Who is eligible to submit a child mental health referral? In most parts of the UK, a GP can refer your teenager to these services. Many local areas also accept referrals from schools, educational psychologists, or other professionals involved with your child. You should check with your local authority or NHS trust to see if they allow for direct parent or self-referrals.

What should I include in a medical referral letter? A strong letter provides specific examples of your child's difficulties, including how long they have lasted and how they impact daily life. You should detail changes in eating, sleep, or mood, and list any risks or previously tried support. Including dates and clear descriptions helps clinicians understand the situation and triage the request more effectively.

How can I help my child during the waiting period? You can provide stability by maintaining steady daily routines, including consistent meal times and sleep schedules. Staying in contact with your child's school can help, as they may offer pastoral support or make reasonable adjustments to attendance. Additionally, keeping a simple record of any behavioural changes helps you track patterns while you wait for the assessment.

Should I consider private support alongside the NHS referral? Choosing private therapy depends on how your teenager is coping and your personal circumstances. Many families choose to keep the NHS referral open while using private sessions to bridge the gap. If you explore this route, ask potential therapists about their experience working with teenagers and how they involve parents in the care process.